its all in the mind

had a pretty messed up day. let me see if i can recall it all here:

- my phone went bonkers and decided to hard reset (all my data was gone)
- had trouble connecting to the VoIP service i was using to call Babe
- asked history lecturer for advice on doin assignment but he's just as clueless as me
- computer decided to restart itself while i was halfway thru the history assignment
- couldnt get any friends to break fast with today
- couldnt take an afternoon nap as planned due to interruptions
- Babe's umbrealla broke

i thought someone put a curse on me. life was going pretty well. i mean even though molecular biology was messed up, i still din feel as bad as i did today. today i just fell down the drain. nothin was going my way. everythin decided to do a u-turn. and if someone decided to have a test on me, they decided to give me a volley of it one after another. thought i might have pissed someone off or something to deserve it.

but at the end of the day, i told myself that its all in the mind. i guess it started to take a downturn when my phone went bonkers and resetted itself. from then on, i got so pissed off that i took everything in a negative light. that was how easy it was to go to the dark side. something which i have been trying to avoid all this while has suddenly came back to haunt me. and the thing was when it affects you, it affects everybody around you. i have to apologise to all my friends if i sounded distant or angry when talking to you today. was not really in a good mood. but i have realised my shortcomings.

it was not fate or destiny or tests or anything of that sort. it was all just me. when i let the first negative thought manifest itself, everything that was slightly wrong turn out to be a titanic mistake in my eyes. but now i have learnt my ways. i hope that this darkness can be kept inside. it may be a part of me. but it is not something i am proud of.

to those who think that your darkness is the only way that can bring you forward, i would encourage you to take a step back and think about it. why? because i was there once. and i can tell you that while i was in darkness, i was never half as great as what i am going to be now that i am surrounded by light. there is a reason why light can overcome darkness. just be careful not to snuff out that light like i did momentarily today.

already things are looking well. gambate!!

Tariq :: email ::
|10:45 pm|
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